Thoughts of a Narcoleptic Mind

I usually describe a Cataplexy attack as feeling like a puppet being held up by nothing but string. Your limbs become like jello or like brittle, dying leaves. It is much deeper than that though. There is this vulnerability that you feel as well. I feel it sometimes anyway. There is this feeling of being exposed, as If you have been stripped of something. I am not sure I would say it is your power topic have been stripped of, even If that is essentially the case. It is an ugly feeling that you can never adequately put into words. Noone who hasn't gone through it will never truly understand it. I will be honest, I have broken down in tears over a Cat attack, usually If was a bad one and while working. There are quite a few Narcolepsy sufferers who feel they have to hide their Narcolepsy like some kind of leprosy. That shouldn't be. We can't let this disease strip us of anymore than it already has. Someone told me they couldn't believe I have Narcolepsy and have had becau...

Sinking emotional quicksand pulling me in Fighting too many battles at once and they all seem impossible to win The grief past and present an ever present shroud that is so dark It is a suffocating presence that weighs heavily on my heart So long to the lingering essence of my emotional enemies coming to steal what fight I have left inside My battles I have given to my Father to heal so many scars I have fought to hide My time for healing My time to rise I will raise up deep from the ashes like a beautiful majestic phoenix flying free through the endless skies

PSA If you keep looking for the negative and questioning every little blessing, you will look up one day and find yourself questioning why the blessings stopped. Not everyone does something for self gain. There are people who genuinely have good hearts. There are people who are sincere in their desires to see others do better. That teacher who goes out of the way for your child in school, maybe he/she realizes they could be that one teacher to really make a difference in your child's life in helping them reach their full potential. That stranger on the street who gives you a friendly smile and hello may just be trying to brighten your day. If you look for reasons to antagonize those trying to help, don't be surprised when there is no help when you are seeking it. Recognize your blessings. Count your blessings. Share your blessings. You will be surprised by How much more joyful your life will become.

How so many choose to forget what the word nigga really means How this one word represents thousands of our people burned, mutilated, murdered, hung up until their necks were broken on trees Maybe you choose not to recognize what the word nigga was meant to symbolize It is a word used to proclaim us as less than, viewed beneath animals in the massa's eyes See over the centuries you have  been brainwashed to believe you are that nigga  that the slave master, that the family breaker, that the wife raper, that the life taker, massa so callously deemed you to be So now how about we deprogram our youth and reprogram them with the truth about what mighty people God created us to be Instead of greeting each other with "What's up my nigga" How about we stand up and prove that we really are bigger than this label that through centuries of mistreatment have now been engrained as a legitimate name  extremely  embedded in the dark crevices of our brains Let us begin to a...

There is an eternal light in everyone. Sometimes it becomes a flicker and seems like it will die out. Sometimes it seems like the light is being consumed by the darkness.  Just know, it is always there, always burning. God will always keep that light burning. Sometimes, you will have to dig a little deeper within

Pedophiles, child abusers, alcoholics, drug abusers Society labels folks without a care attributing false facts that were never there You share the stories but do you first check the facts Do you examine the sources before posting possible lies you may never be able to take back Do you assume things are truth without considering how lives could be ruined by simply sharing a story that simply exists because of the imagination of some   faceless human Do you research first because you have logically considered this could be truth or vindictive payback fro m some nameless person whose heart is bitter How many countless lies have been told how many reputations ruined as some made up history of  a very visible victim's life unfolds Stop before you follow Think before you share Don't become a part of the problem by helping tear down our communities with unverifiable information instead of lifting each other up with positive affirmations

Please lift me up in prayer. Those that know me well know I have always busted my butt. My life has revolved around my two daughters, who mean the world to me, and my responsibilities. I have worked through Bronchitis, Upper Respiratory Infections, etc. I have always been about doing What needed to be done to get the bills paid and provide a roof for my children. I always imagined working until old age for some big corporation. True, I always knew something wasn't right. I saw doctor after doctor, specialist after specialist thinking, "I will get fixed and continue working and all will be right with the world." It never occurred to me that I would be diagnosed with a chronic, incurable illness. It was like a big punch in the gut being told I would probably have to stop working. It actually took almost being fired to realize how serious it really was. A year later, however, I am still not completely out of the denial stage. I am still pushing myself, but I think I ha...